News From ModifiedMama

So, it’s been since August that I’ve posted anything and I’m ready to share the exciting reason why with you all!! His name is Journey and he’s my new Service Dog from ECAD, Educated Canines Assisting with Disabilities located in Torrington, Connecticut!

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I attended team-training in September and since I’ve been back home in my state of Tennessee, it’s been an intense, often times stressful and overwhelming transition for me. And for my daughter, who’s had to step down from the unrealistic, unhealthy position as my main helper, though for us this was normal and necessary given our circumstances. I’ve been adjusting to life as a single mom to 2 kids now! Haha! But in all actuality, it has been difficult for me and my daughter. Things are settling down in the routine department and I’m hoping that being a Service Dog handler will add another helpful component to my site.

Due to all the new changes, I’m way behind on my posts! So, here’s what you can look forward to in 2018 – a couple of travel reviews, several hotel and product reviews, opinion pieces on how my daughter’s school has made accessibility a priority and other pieces on feelings, events, experiences, thoughts, etc. from my life as a Modified single Mama and now Service Dog handler!

And remember: You can find Mama on FaceBook! And, you can follow my adventures with Journey  on Facebook, too!

From our family to yours, Happy 2018! Wishing you all the best!

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Mommy’s Nervous About Kindergarten, too!

Today, my daughter began Kindergarten. For the past several days, she’s expressed the typical fears and nervousness about starting at a new school with a new teacher in a new building with new friends to make and so on…. We talked about her feelings and I tried to help calm her anxiety by pointing out all her amazing qualities, her strengths, the fact that everyone in her class was feeling the same way and by praying with her.

It wasn’t until we were walking (well, I was rolling…) down the hall that I started having my own worries and fears. Kids stared at us and I received the usual range of facial expressions – some children smiled sweetly, others looked at my chair with terror in their eyes and others frowned at me. The ‘peekers’ were there, too – the little kids who slide behind their parent and glimpse out at me shyly. While this is part of my normal, every-day life, it got me thinking about the days ahead for my own little one.

As I got into my van, I wondered if my daughter was in her classroom fielding questions about me. Was she having to explain why I’m in the chair? Was she trying to answer a multitude of questions about our lives instead of playing with the purple play-doh that had been set at her desk? I worried she was spending time advocating for me instead of making friends. Plus, she can get quite loud and vocal since she’s very protective of me: there was an incident at her last school where a boy laughed at a disabled character in a story book and my child screamed at him, “Disabilities are NOT funny!” While this is a trait of hers I’m quite proud of, I don’t want it to distract from her enjoyment or engagement in the classroom, especially a new class.

I know that what makes up our ‘normal’ are the stares, the comments, the whispers, the looks, the questions and what-not. I know none of this is new to either of us. Perhaps I’m worrying for no reason (most likely the case!) but I simply want my daughter to focus on and enjoy her first day of ‘big kid school’ and not have to automatically educate a class full of five-year-olds.

The guilt, the illogical but real guilt is back today. My differences have the ability to make my daughter different. While growing up with a disabled mother has impacted her positively, I worry it can have negative consequences as well. I hope she’ll be treated like any other child by the kids at her new school. I hope kids at this school will be just as easy-going as at her preschool – but these kids are older and this is a new experience for her as well as for me as a mom. Will my daughter be bullied because of me? Will she be shunned?

So, there it is – I’ve got the “First Day of Big Kid School” jitters, too. They’re probably all just us unfounded as my daughter’s fears but they’re real to me just like they’re real to her.

*So, I just picked her up a couple of hours ago and guess what? She had the best first day ever! She made “SIX new best friends” and apparently, none of them asked about her mom’s wheels!! What were we both so worried about??*

Within Reach…

What do we do when neither she nor I can reach something?? Work together because everything is always within reach when love stretches the possibilities! The only thing that’ll hold us back is US! We make a great team!

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